Newbie
Hi, y'all. New here.
The basics:
Name: Marla Randolph Stevens (formerly Peeples, formerly Devendorf) (actually nee: Marla Jefferson Randolph Stevens Peeples -- there's a Purse in there somewhere but the families argue about where)
Age: 53 -- old enough for AARP but young enough to still be dangerous.
Heritage: Jefferson descendant who understands that the Hemings are my double-half-cousins -- and sometimes more. Also descended from Pilgrims who came over on the second boat, the Anne, and founded Dorchesters from Massachusetts to Georgia (mother lives on grant land that James Oglethorpe used to entice our people to mid-coastal Georgia as a bulwark against Spanish incursion from Florida.) Magna Carta surety. Lots of other illustrious forebears. We've had elected and/or appointed officials in my family since way before this country was a country. We have enough lawyers per capita to drive each other stark raving looney -- and do on a semi-regular basis. We call those occasions Monticello Association meetings. We are expected to be articulate (naturally using big words -- it's not an affectation), to evidence leadership qualities, and not limit ourselves to one field of expertise. Most of us are insufferably elitist. I'm big on meritocracy and shared power instead and try to remember that everyone has their own gifts and that finding them is fun.
Religion: Whiskey-palian background with lots of metaphysics. Currently a Wiccan/Buddhist combo, finding best expression of that in Tibetan Bon.
Religiously married: To Phyllis (Deaton) Rowe Stevens (formerly DeMass) since Sweetest Day, 1984. Devastating dry wit. Inerrant B.S. detector. Loves me -- really loves me.
Civilly married to same, July 26, 2003, in Toronto. I am the luckiest woman on the face of this planet. Nearly 21 years and it just keeps getting better.
Persona: Fat person who believes not that I am too big but that the seats in airplanes are too small. Love a good argument on the merits of an issue and respect those few whose arguments are of such quality that they make me rethink my own. My father, a dyed-in-the-wool Reagan corporate Republican once said of me, "For a damned leftist radical, you're one of the most conservative people I've ever met." Generally good-tempered, well-mannered, and patient but suffering fools less and less as I age. Believe in a properly set table and timely, handwritten thank-you and bread-and-butter notes on the best stationery one can muster. Own and use calling -- not business -- cards for social occasions. Think thermography (as opposed to engraving) is the work of the devil.
Pet peeves: Sloppy diction, particularly when committed by broadcast journalists. Form over function. "Hopefully" used in place of "I hope". "I'm not political" in place of "I'm too [unflattering descriptor here] to be bothered with my political responsibility in a participatory democracy so I'm trying to be intentionally blind to the dire effects of that in a self-absolvatory manner." People who come to me for help when the political they've claimed they're not falls on them as so many young pines in a high wind storm.
Background: Savannah thing with formative years, including the '60s, between GA coast & SFO Bay Area -- parents had nasty divorce involving corporations, judicial corruption, alienation of affection and childnapping -- whole soap operas have been based on less. I found refuge in Savannah's vibrant gay community (my first gay rights work in 1960 = blowing up balloons for first Sara Awards in Savannah) and civil rights organizing (first CD bust as child in early 60s, youth civil rights leadership conf. w/ MLK, Jr. in '66) but mostly was just a water baby honing such skills as catching shrimp with a cast net and reading, reading, reading
More formative years in SFO Bay Area -- Mill Valley, Tamalpais H.S., David Crosby jamming with friends in the marijuana haze in the amphitheater at lunch, Elsa Gidlow three streets downhill, etc. I did war protests, sang madrigals and in church choirs as a pro. Lost virginity. Had lots of sex. Became one of Fritz Perls' experiment-to-create-truly-self-actualized "kids" after he found me working as a 'trip guide' at the Haight Free Clinic at age 16. (Had dropped acid several years before that when it was legal -- and, later, when it was not, plus other interesting drugs. None the worse for that wear and have many happy memories of the sun not being there.) Had free run of Esalen. Learned much. Became youngest registered lobbyist in state and got my bills passed. Kind beau not into SM made sure I was introduced to that aspect of myself in first public scene at SF Sexual Freedom League gathering. Coming out as Kinsey 4.75-5.25 lesbian didn't go so well. First major depression. GF got married. I left town.
Very short stint as a Converse "Connie" -- bad fit. Escaped to Savannah and my "heart papa", James Arthur "Queen of Everything" Williams -- yes, "The Book" one (and, if I ever see that lying, superficial John Berendt again, I'm likely to deck him.)
Worked with Jim restoring houses & antiques (and I play a mean game of Psycho-Dice), applied old childhood skills (and knowledge of secret trout and bass drops gleaned from wonderful old men who liked me as a kid because I could be still and quiet and listened well enough that they shared their secrets with me when they wouldn't with male peers desperate to learn them) to create successful inland waterway tourist fishing business, kept up church choir singing, became cantor of oldest Reform temple in USA, played viola in symphony as well as on per service basis with lots of small orchestras in the southeast, did string quartet camp job in Hamptons filling quartets for doctors who mostly played violin or cello, taught myself respiratory therapy and was registered under a grandfather clause -- including work on early development of Bournes Infant Respirator, continued lobbying and public policy work, became (with Integrity founder Louis Crewe) one of two politically out gay people in Georgia outside of Atlanta, kissed many frogettes, was raped -- complete with aborted pregnancy (thank the stars for recently decided Roe case) -- in line of duty, nominated for Queen of Everything -- twice (Jim pulled the many nominations for Fag Hag of the Year, quietly saying they didn't quite get it), avoided marrying Jim, fell in love, moved to her middle Georgia turf, lived off the land, went back to school, achieved notice of KKK, had to leave state because there are only so many times you can get shot at before some fool's going to get lucky.
GA voice teacher's ex-lover was head of voice dept. at Butler U. in Indianapolis. Got scholarship to work with him, job with opera company and church choir and after school youth choir, moved to Indianapolis. Kept up lobbying/public policy work with N.O.W. & LGBT groups, incl. quietly repealing state sodomy law by getting the legislature to use a highly credentialled model penal code sans sodomy laws when it came time to revise the state's one -- and kept the forces of evil from figuring out that it was missing for two decades. GF moved back home to mama. Another major depression. Got into abusive relationship. MOW 78 Congress. Finished voice degree. Lesbian bookstore thing. Did first speech on then-unnamed AIDS in late 1982. Papa Jim shot Danny Hansford in self-defense. Back to Savannah to take care of Jim's business while he was in jail following second conviction before release when new trial granted. It helped get the abusive GF out of my life for good.
Returned to Indy. Diagnosed as cyclothymic. That explained lots and treatment gave me the ability to consistently use my abilities. Went to work for Mood Swing Clinic. Fell in love after running like scared rabbit from it. Married. Renewed old work started with Fritz Perls with grand multiples. Lesbian SM organizing, incl. 1987 MOW, Michigan Whips. Phyllis and I organized 87 state MOW contingent. Member, Michael Hardwick and the Supremes affinity group ("Sodomy! in the name of love, Your laws just break my heart") and busted holding Michael's hand on Supreme Court plaza 10-11-87. Started lobbying FT for state ACLU after losing the first of the state marriage non-recognition battles in conference without even knowing it and vowing in my best Scarlett O'Hara imitation that, while I might lose in the future, I'd never be hornswaggled again. ACT(ed)-UP. Did lots of corporate/business lobbying/association management (including for sex workers' groups) to pay for the privilege of being a very abused, mostly volunteer, queer rights lobbyist/organizer. Most quoted non-public-official in Indiana press, according to Indianapolis Star.
Executive committee member in charge of lobbying, 1993 MOW. Conceived and led what Washington Post Hill reporter (who'd never covered queer stuff before that) called the "largest, most expertly and comprehensively organized event-based lobbying effort in the history of the nation's capitol, exceeding...even the NRA" with over 12, 500 trained-by-experts participants in individual and small group appointments (with handouts -- including videos -- for Congress, training materials, pre-and-post appointment planning/debriefing sessions, translation and disability services, and at-home followup). Simultaneously served as interim public policy director of NGLTF while they were in leadership flux. (Later proven winnable gays in the military strategy overridden by coastal powerhouses who couldn't lobby their way out of wet paper bag. Tim McFeeley and I were disgusted.
I left Beltway for Midwest where the real action would be. Co-founded harm reduction project and statewide LGBT rights group. Returned briefly to D.C. after 2002 sea change to teach defensive-lobbying-techniques-for-when-the-legis-boys-you've-always-depended-on-to-save-your-sorry-ass-are-now-in-the-minority-and-unable-to-help-anymore. Led successful battle to get gay rights into state party platform over Evan Bayh's near-dead-body. Beat back HIV mass quarantine attempts, marriage amendments, adoption/fostering ban attempts (the sitting on the table filibustering bust impetus), reinstatement of sodomy law attempts, passed state's first (queer-inclusive) hate crime law (10 year battle), opened domestic violence protection to non-marrieds, nation's strongest civilian police complaint board (20 year battle), etc. Developed reputation as no-holds-barred, not-to-be-fucked-with but fair and funny reputation as well as dedicated, hard working commission member/appointee. Democratic precinct committee chairperson with highest voter record improvement in city.
Survived cancer -- twice. Became increasingly disabled. Finally diagnosed with fibromyalgia/myofascial pain complex that they say I've had for about twenty-five years. Had to learn to adapt.
Civilly married. Became unconvicted felons again when we signed joint customs declaration on return from Caribbean honeymoon cruise. We won't lie about our marriage on our tax forms, either, filing as the married people we are. We've racked up about a million dollars in potential criminal fines and about a hundred years in potential prison time under the old sentencing guidelines between us -- so far.
Wife's company she'd worked for for 30 years Milkened. She became one of seven people retained by new owners after the old company's agents threatened walkout if they didn't keep her. (She's brilliant and big on service provision and expertise.) Transferred to its Des Moines home office so she could keep domestic partner benefits and seniority that gives her about a month-and-a-half of paid leave per year.
Defeated two Iowa attempts at marriage amendments -- one from afar because Iowa and I are not a good match. Doing itinerate marriage-related political work elsewhere. (We fly alot.) Have legal domicile I've never spent a night in.
Other stuff: Great cook. Also make one heckuva fine Chatham Artillery Punch. Disney freak -- it's the way they make life easier for us people in chairs, not to mention that it's a good escape from my gritty hardball political life. Have a thing about trains. Read everything in sight -- addiction -- can't help it -- "input, more input!" Interrupted study of Tibetan language to concentrate on French in case we need those extra immigration application points if we have to flee the U.S. for Canada. Longstanding interest in SW Asia, including Afghanistan (9/11 did not come as a surprise to Phyllis and me and we cannot forgive that it was to Condi Rice who damned well ought to have known better) and Tibet/Tibetan diaspora. Pacers fan.
Really lousy at: chemistry, physics, and softball.
Motto: Share the action and passion of your time at peril of being judged not to have existed.
What drives me: Knowing what Oskar Schindler felt like as he broke down on the railroad tracks on his way out of the factory at the end of the war.
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The basics:
Name: Marla Randolph Stevens (formerly Peeples, formerly Devendorf) (actually nee: Marla Jefferson Randolph Stevens Peeples -- there's a Purse in there somewhere but the families argue about where)
Age: 53 -- old enough for AARP but young enough to still be dangerous.
Heritage: Jefferson descendant who understands that the Hemings are my double-half-cousins -- and sometimes more. Also descended from Pilgrims who came over on the second boat, the Anne, and founded Dorchesters from Massachusetts to Georgia (mother lives on grant land that James Oglethorpe used to entice our people to mid-coastal Georgia as a bulwark against Spanish incursion from Florida.) Magna Carta surety. Lots of other illustrious forebears. We've had elected and/or appointed officials in my family since way before this country was a country. We have enough lawyers per capita to drive each other stark raving looney -- and do on a semi-regular basis. We call those occasions Monticello Association meetings. We are expected to be articulate (naturally using big words -- it's not an affectation), to evidence leadership qualities, and not limit ourselves to one field of expertise. Most of us are insufferably elitist. I'm big on meritocracy and shared power instead and try to remember that everyone has their own gifts and that finding them is fun.
Religion: Whiskey-palian background with lots of metaphysics. Currently a Wiccan/Buddhist combo, finding best expression of that in Tibetan Bon.
Religiously married: To Phyllis (Deaton) Rowe Stevens (formerly DeMass) since Sweetest Day, 1984. Devastating dry wit. Inerrant B.S. detector. Loves me -- really loves me.
Civilly married to same, July 26, 2003, in Toronto. I am the luckiest woman on the face of this planet. Nearly 21 years and it just keeps getting better.
Persona: Fat person who believes not that I am too big but that the seats in airplanes are too small. Love a good argument on the merits of an issue and respect those few whose arguments are of such quality that they make me rethink my own. My father, a dyed-in-the-wool Reagan corporate Republican once said of me, "For a damned leftist radical, you're one of the most conservative people I've ever met." Generally good-tempered, well-mannered, and patient but suffering fools less and less as I age. Believe in a properly set table and timely, handwritten thank-you and bread-and-butter notes on the best stationery one can muster. Own and use calling -- not business -- cards for social occasions. Think thermography (as opposed to engraving) is the work of the devil.
Pet peeves: Sloppy diction, particularly when committed by broadcast journalists. Form over function. "Hopefully" used in place of "I hope". "I'm not political" in place of "I'm too [unflattering descriptor here] to be bothered with my political responsibility in a participatory democracy so I'm trying to be intentionally blind to the dire effects of that in a self-absolvatory manner." People who come to me for help when the political they've claimed they're not falls on them as so many young pines in a high wind storm.
Background: Savannah thing with formative years, including the '60s, between GA coast & SFO Bay Area -- parents had nasty divorce involving corporations, judicial corruption, alienation of affection and childnapping -- whole soap operas have been based on less. I found refuge in Savannah's vibrant gay community (my first gay rights work in 1960 = blowing up balloons for first Sara Awards in Savannah) and civil rights organizing (first CD bust as child in early 60s, youth civil rights leadership conf. w/ MLK, Jr. in '66) but mostly was just a water baby honing such skills as catching shrimp with a cast net and reading, reading, reading
More formative years in SFO Bay Area -- Mill Valley, Tamalpais H.S., David Crosby jamming with friends in the marijuana haze in the amphitheater at lunch, Elsa Gidlow three streets downhill, etc. I did war protests, sang madrigals and in church choirs as a pro. Lost virginity. Had lots of sex. Became one of Fritz Perls' experiment-to-create-truly-self-actualized "kids" after he found me working as a 'trip guide' at the Haight Free Clinic at age 16. (Had dropped acid several years before that when it was legal -- and, later, when it was not, plus other interesting drugs. None the worse for that wear and have many happy memories of the sun not being there.) Had free run of Esalen. Learned much. Became youngest registered lobbyist in state and got my bills passed. Kind beau not into SM made sure I was introduced to that aspect of myself in first public scene at SF Sexual Freedom League gathering. Coming out as Kinsey 4.75-5.25 lesbian didn't go so well. First major depression. GF got married. I left town.
Very short stint as a Converse "Connie" -- bad fit. Escaped to Savannah and my "heart papa", James Arthur "Queen of Everything" Williams -- yes, "The Book" one (and, if I ever see that lying, superficial John Berendt again, I'm likely to deck him.)
Worked with Jim restoring houses & antiques (and I play a mean game of Psycho-Dice), applied old childhood skills (and knowledge of secret trout and bass drops gleaned from wonderful old men who liked me as a kid because I could be still and quiet and listened well enough that they shared their secrets with me when they wouldn't with male peers desperate to learn them) to create successful inland waterway tourist fishing business, kept up church choir singing, became cantor of oldest Reform temple in USA, played viola in symphony as well as on per service basis with lots of small orchestras in the southeast, did string quartet camp job in Hamptons filling quartets for doctors who mostly played violin or cello, taught myself respiratory therapy and was registered under a grandfather clause -- including work on early development of Bournes Infant Respirator, continued lobbying and public policy work, became (with Integrity founder Louis Crewe) one of two politically out gay people in Georgia outside of Atlanta, kissed many frogettes, was raped -- complete with aborted pregnancy (thank the stars for recently decided Roe case) -- in line of duty, nominated for Queen of Everything -- twice (Jim pulled the many nominations for Fag Hag of the Year, quietly saying they didn't quite get it), avoided marrying Jim, fell in love, moved to her middle Georgia turf, lived off the land, went back to school, achieved notice of KKK, had to leave state because there are only so many times you can get shot at before some fool's going to get lucky.
GA voice teacher's ex-lover was head of voice dept. at Butler U. in Indianapolis. Got scholarship to work with him, job with opera company and church choir and after school youth choir, moved to Indianapolis. Kept up lobbying/public policy work with N.O.W. & LGBT groups, incl. quietly repealing state sodomy law by getting the legislature to use a highly credentialled model penal code sans sodomy laws when it came time to revise the state's one -- and kept the forces of evil from figuring out that it was missing for two decades. GF moved back home to mama. Another major depression. Got into abusive relationship. MOW 78 Congress. Finished voice degree. Lesbian bookstore thing. Did first speech on then-unnamed AIDS in late 1982. Papa Jim shot Danny Hansford in self-defense. Back to Savannah to take care of Jim's business while he was in jail following second conviction before release when new trial granted. It helped get the abusive GF out of my life for good.
Returned to Indy. Diagnosed as cyclothymic. That explained lots and treatment gave me the ability to consistently use my abilities. Went to work for Mood Swing Clinic. Fell in love after running like scared rabbit from it. Married. Renewed old work started with Fritz Perls with grand multiples. Lesbian SM organizing, incl. 1987 MOW, Michigan Whips. Phyllis and I organized 87 state MOW contingent. Member, Michael Hardwick and the Supremes affinity group ("Sodomy! in the name of love, Your laws just break my heart") and busted holding Michael's hand on Supreme Court plaza 10-11-87. Started lobbying FT for state ACLU after losing the first of the state marriage non-recognition battles in conference without even knowing it and vowing in my best Scarlett O'Hara imitation that, while I might lose in the future, I'd never be hornswaggled again. ACT(ed)-UP. Did lots of corporate/business lobbying/association management (including for sex workers' groups) to pay for the privilege of being a very abused, mostly volunteer, queer rights lobbyist/organizer. Most quoted non-public-official in Indiana press, according to Indianapolis Star.
Executive committee member in charge of lobbying, 1993 MOW. Conceived and led what Washington Post Hill reporter (who'd never covered queer stuff before that) called the "largest, most expertly and comprehensively organized event-based lobbying effort in the history of the nation's capitol, exceeding...even the NRA" with over 12, 500 trained-by-experts participants in individual and small group appointments (with handouts -- including videos -- for Congress, training materials, pre-and-post appointment planning/debriefing sessions, translation and disability services, and at-home followup). Simultaneously served as interim public policy director of NGLTF while they were in leadership flux. (Later proven winnable gays in the military strategy overridden by coastal powerhouses who couldn't lobby their way out of wet paper bag. Tim McFeeley and I were disgusted.
I left Beltway for Midwest where the real action would be. Co-founded harm reduction project and statewide LGBT rights group. Returned briefly to D.C. after 2002 sea change to teach defensive-lobbying-techniques-for-when-the-legis-boys-you've-always-depended-on-to-save-your-sorry-ass-are-now-in-the-minority-and-unable-to-help-anymore. Led successful battle to get gay rights into state party platform over Evan Bayh's near-dead-body. Beat back HIV mass quarantine attempts, marriage amendments, adoption/fostering ban attempts (the sitting on the table filibustering bust impetus), reinstatement of sodomy law attempts, passed state's first (queer-inclusive) hate crime law (10 year battle), opened domestic violence protection to non-marrieds, nation's strongest civilian police complaint board (20 year battle), etc. Developed reputation as no-holds-barred, not-to-be-fucked-with but fair and funny reputation as well as dedicated, hard working commission member/appointee. Democratic precinct committee chairperson with highest voter record improvement in city.
Survived cancer -- twice. Became increasingly disabled. Finally diagnosed with fibromyalgia/myofascial pain complex that they say I've had for about twenty-five years. Had to learn to adapt.
Civilly married. Became unconvicted felons again when we signed joint customs declaration on return from Caribbean honeymoon cruise. We won't lie about our marriage on our tax forms, either, filing as the married people we are. We've racked up about a million dollars in potential criminal fines and about a hundred years in potential prison time under the old sentencing guidelines between us -- so far.
Wife's company she'd worked for for 30 years Milkened. She became one of seven people retained by new owners after the old company's agents threatened walkout if they didn't keep her. (She's brilliant and big on service provision and expertise.) Transferred to its Des Moines home office so she could keep domestic partner benefits and seniority that gives her about a month-and-a-half of paid leave per year.
Defeated two Iowa attempts at marriage amendments -- one from afar because Iowa and I are not a good match. Doing itinerate marriage-related political work elsewhere. (We fly alot.) Have legal domicile I've never spent a night in.
Other stuff: Great cook. Also make one heckuva fine Chatham Artillery Punch. Disney freak -- it's the way they make life easier for us people in chairs, not to mention that it's a good escape from my gritty hardball political life. Have a thing about trains. Read everything in sight -- addiction -- can't help it -- "input, more input!" Interrupted study of Tibetan language to concentrate on French in case we need those extra immigration application points if we have to flee the U.S. for Canada. Longstanding interest in SW Asia, including Afghanistan (9/11 did not come as a surprise to Phyllis and me and we cannot forgive that it was to Condi Rice who damned well ought to have known better) and Tibet/Tibetan diaspora. Pacers fan.
Really lousy at: chemistry, physics, and softball.
Motto: Share the action and passion of your time at peril of being judged not to have existed.
What drives me: Knowing what Oskar Schindler felt like as he broke down on the railroad tracks on his way out of the factory at the end of the war.
